A few months ago, I enjoyed playful banter with my daughter and her father via text messages. He was coming to Georgia for the weekend. We both claimed that the other would have regrets and fall in love all over again! Yeah, right!
Guilty! Yes, I felt a sense of contentment that my ex still found me attractive. More importantly, it felt good because I felt nothing for him emotionally!
That we communicated via text message is interesting! We met in the 80s – when Ronald Reagan was president, a gallon of gas was $1.20 and society still believed that going viral was not a good thing.
So, the two of you meet, fall in love, marry or commit to a monogamous relationship. You fall out of love, break-up and move on with your life. Years later, you find out that in the recesses of his mind, he believes you never stopped loving him.
Is that machismo at its best? A testosterone overdose? Maybe. But keep in mind that men are twice as likely to drown as women because of over-confidence.
Whether male or female, not many things can give our egos a boost like seeing an old flame years after the fire is gone. Yes, women have egos too. Knowing he is salivating (Okay, I am exaggerating.) and regrets letting you go is, well, delightful!
What is it about human nature that an ex can raise a desire – or ire for that matter – to have our egos satiated? Is it feelings left over from the past? Or, is it simply an inflation of pride in who we are? Whatever the case, it sure is fun!
We get wrapped up in nostalgia and our emotions – what I like to call the younger sibling – can become entangled. However, before we fall off the emotional cliff, our older sibling – the intellect – steps in and reminds us that there is a reason our ex is our ex.
We do not have to deny moments of nostalgia. It is acceptable to reminisce about the wonderful memories – but do not forget there is a reason the relationship ended. Let’s face it: Not everyone comes into your life to stay; some people come into your life to leave.
Just enjoy the moment for what it is: an opportunity to take an ego trip to the land of contentment because he is miserable and kicking himself everyday for letting you go. There I go exaggerating again!
“Egotism is the glue with which you get stuck to yourself.” Anonymous
